I have one academic critique: I suggest that many therapists are still holding onto unidentified and unresolved parental issues not only because they are so deeply afraid of their parents, but because they are so horribly afraid of BEING INADEQUATE PARENTS. I think we're up against something very biological here, the incredible drive to be good parents (I can only speak to this based on observation; I fortunately live in a time where I was able to choose not to have children that I would subsequently screw up with my own profound mental illness), hence the depth and entrenchment of the taboo against deep and close examination and criticism of the damage that parents do, accidental and otherwise.
This slim, impassioned, almost poetic volume has revolutionized my life already, and it has been only 24 hrs since I completed reading it for the first of what will be many times. I can also understand why some people would want to set it on fire.
Read it and decide for yourself. May it give you as much strength and hope in your struggle as it has given me. I am about to buy another 5 copies to distribute to friends.
Alice Miller's way of describing what it is like to be in such an unstable household was so simple yet straightforward. She talked like I talked and we seemed to be speaking the same language. I am sure that is why I related so well to this book. I recommend this book to anyone who has come from a "dysfunctional yet unstable family" and who may be having trouble with "love" and relationships. It is an easy read yet so profound. This book took my breath away and it is a treasure I will keep always.
